Leaving on a Jetplane

I will be leaving Trinidad in 11 days, not because I hate it here and not because I am being persecuted, not per se anyway. The fact is that I cannot seem to gain any kind of traction as regards my film-making here. With such a small pool to swim in and with so many fish around, it follows that getting ahead may not be solely based on merit but on some sort of unspoken pecking order. Not that I think I deserve to be further ahead than I am, far from it in fact. I do not even consider myself by any stretch of the imagination, the finished product. I am a student filmmaker, and will always be, even if my first class degree in film production says otherwise.

What I really want and need is a mentor, an organization, something, somewhere where I can learn the ropes in a practical way. Sure I have worked on quite literally one or two projects off an on during the year and a half since leaving the university, but this is not enough, not for me anyway. I need more.

I have continued to exercise, I have kept writing and editing small bits together but I think I crave structure and I crave a high workload as funny as that may sound. I want to be immersed in film, not because I want to be a star or anything but simply because there is nothing else I wish to do with my life. I gave up a lot to pursue this path and I will see it through. Time I feel is limited. After all I did start late in this business. It’s probably natural that I feel a bit impatient. I have fewer years to play with that some of the others. It is with this in mind that I am leaving. I don’t know what I will find when I arrive but I plan to make the most of whatever opportunities come my way. There are some leads that I have identified which look hopeful. We will see how they pan out.

Some may argue that I am contributing to the brain drain but I am not doing this with the intent of never coming back. I simply wish to improve my skills, to grow as a practitioner and I do not think that I can do that sufficiently at home. At the risk of sounding pretentious, I have to be a prophet in exile for a while. When I return to my homeland, my intent is to change things (for the better) in any way I can. Hopefully by then I will have gained enough influence to do that. I do not know if I will be successful but I know that I have to try.

Upward and onward!

Infinite Regression

I wanted to write something but found myself stumped. Where were all my ideas? Why had they suddenly dried up? Was it because I had to go find a “real job” and I didn’t have the time to explore my innermost thoughts? No, that couldn’t be it. After an initial hectic period, the job had lulled somewhat and my days were filled with facebook status messages, tweets and youtube vids. Hell I should be happy right? Payday is tomorrow. I read about Nolan’s hit movie and think, “man, that’s what I need to do; write a screenplay and make a film that destroys all comers.

What I wouldn’t do for some inspiration right about now. I lose myself. Quantic’s “Infinite Regression” plays on my ipod and suddenly I’m in a desert where I meet a Rumpelstiltskin type character. He gives me a grand idea and I wake up to find that there is a manuscript with no words and no title on my desk, as well as a contract needing my signature. I give it and suddenly the blank pages are filled with words…I wake up from the dream, and suddenly I have an idea.

“Infinite regression, it is the point where the artist becomes both the observer and the observed.”

More to come… listen to Quantic in the meantime.

Purgatory

It has been just about a year since I completed my BA in film Production. The climate here in Trinidad is such that there really isn’t an industry to speak of, while there is (limited) access to funding and some films are being made, there simply isn’t enough regular work to go around. It is simply impossible to survive of your (pitiful) earnings as a filmmaker. Even if you do manage to get a short or a feature made, there is not an effective system of distribution, the chances of your film getting anywhere are slim and none. Sure you may get a few pats on the back from your peers as was the case with my last short Queen of the Brands, (my final year project which ended up opening the 09 edition of the Trinidad and Tobago Film Festival), but what happens after that. how does it translate into work? It doesn’t really. I can write a million scripts which people will claim to like but be unwilling to produce. so what then? Do it yourself. that in itself is a daunting prospect but it is the reality with which many up and coming filmmakers are faced.

Make no mistake, I am not complaining, my prospects have always been slim and I knew that the moment I decided to leave my job at the phone company to pursue my dream. That is why i made the decision to move abroad in the first place. Unfortunately, circumstances brought me back home, where I have had to take this indirect path to where I want to be. I do not view the obstacles I face now as insurmountable, rather I see them as motivation for me to work harder. With this in mind, I have been working on an escape plan which I am not sure will work but I have no alternative, this is something I must do. It has cost me a relationship amongst other things but my obsession ( I admit it is an obsession) to become the best at what I do is the only thing that drives me. It was the only thing that kept me sane during the mostly depressing year that has passed. This is indeed some kind of Purgatory but one I intend to leave, and soon!

The Thing About Iran

Above all else, as a filmmaker and student of media in general, I know first hand of its influence and methods used to manipulate the audience. That being said, while I may not agree with all the policies of the present Iranian administration, there is a blatant bias in the way the western media has reported in the lead up to the election and continues to narrate events in the aftermath.

I believe in honest journalism but it seems to be fleeting in these times. The one world (read American economic and cultural domination World) agenda being propagated by media agents of the corporate monster in the fourth estate does not fit into that category unfortunately. I don’t see that changing anytime soon though.

Read more about unbalanced reporting here…

http://www.globalresearch.ca/index.php?context=va&aid=14017

In the Beginning

So this is my first attempt at blogging. I figured it was a good way to market myself as an independent filmmaker. Hopefully it turns out well. We’ll see how it goes. Preparing to submit my latest film “Queen of the Brands” to a couple of minor film festivals and doing a Saturday class at the moment so there won’t be a lot of time for posting in the initial phase. there will be more to come though. I promise you that. Check out my Showreel in the meantime.